One Resolution to Rule Them All
New Year's is a powerful time to connect to the possibility of a new beginning. It's pretty much the only time that we, as a collective, regardless of religious beliefs, are encouraged to consciously take time in self-inquiry.
But here's the thing…most of us aren't taught how to engage in this process in a way that truly inspires growth…and so, most of our New Year's Resolutions just become annual reminders of all of the ways we’re not proving our worth. All the ways we’re proving to ourselves we’re not enough.
This is a symptom of a larger problem: for many of us, self-inquiry tends to be rooted in negative self-talk and self-judgment. In an attempt to achieve an imagined state of perfection, we devise a laundry list of all the things we've done ‘wrong.' All the ways we've failed ourselves and others. All the ways we have proven ourselves to be unworthy.
If you've been hanging around personal development spaces and spiritual communities for a while, you know aaaaall about your Negativity Bias. But chances are, even if you're aware of it, it's still thriving, dictating a solid percentage of your thoughts and behaviors. Because that primal fucker is STRONG.
My friend – the number one habit you need to break next year is letting your Negativity Bias run your life. If you make one New Year’s Resolution this year, commit to getting your brain free 🧠 from that Inner Critic’s judgey little shame hooks. 😈
Take a moment to contemplate what it would actually be like if you…
stopped beating yourself up in 2023?
stopped talking shit to yourself?
stopped telling yourself you need to do more?
started speaking to yourself with respect?
started treating yourself with kindness?
accepted your ‘shortcomings’ as nothing more than a thread of the grand tapestry that makes you YOU?
treated yourself like you were someone you TRULY cared about?
Because when you learn how to speak and act kindly to yourself, you rise in self-worth and self-love. And when you're fully (or even mostly) established in self-love, you find PEACE. You find JOY.
From here, you can more naturally, effortlessly, and effectively ‘achieve’ all those New Year's resolution-ey things - at least the ones that matter, anyway.
Because you’ll actually be inspired to take care of yourself - mind, body, heart, and spirit - not because you're not worthy if you DON’T - but because you’ll KNOW exactly how fucking worthy you are – and so you give yourself the care and love you need to thrive in this world.
So in an effort to create the only new habit that really matters, I invite you to stop reflecting on all the things you did WRONG this past year…and shift your perspective…
What would 2023 be like if you:
realized that you have nothing to prove
honored your energy?
more fully expressed your gifts?
did more of what you love?
lovingly tended to your body, mind, and heart?
trusted yourself more?
knew there was no race to the finish line?
What would your New Year's Resolutions look like if they:
reminded you that you are ALWAYS enough?
were deeply rooted in self-acceptance and self-love?
created space for growth, however it comes?
gave permission, instead of restricted?
encouraged you to be MORE of yourself?
helped you connect to gratitude and presence each day?
So, my friend – this year, I encourage you to commit to a practice of self-inquiry that focuses on self-acceptance over self-judgment. I encourage you to become consciously become aware of the primal Little Asshole in your mind. The one who tells you that if you’re not perfect, you’ll be kicked out of the tribe. And tell it to STFU.
As the old En Vogue saying goes, ‘free your miiiiind, and the rest will follow.’🎶💃🏼
And remember - you are enough. You always have been. But even as I type these words, I know that they won’t do you much good if you’re struggling in this department. Because no amount of external validation will ever create an inner feeling of enoughness. So stop looking for it. Self worth and self love are an inside job.
PS. If you’re struggling with self-worth and you’re into/open to Human Design, take a look at your bodygraph. If you have an open heart/will/ego center… your challenge with self-worth is simply an energetic vulnerability in your chart. If you want to learn more, feel free to book a reading!!
PPS. Don’t forget to honor your energy this New Year’s Eve. You don’t need to a big night out or a fancy dinner. You don’t need to do a toast at midnight. You don’t even need to stay up till midnight. It doesn’t matter. If that’s your thing, enjoy. Otherwise, start the new year exactly as is correct for YOU. 🥳
PPPS. If you want to come practice living in self-love, honoring your energy, without guilt or shame - come on retreat to Mexico with me! March 26-31st - it’s going to be absolutely beautiful - and a lot of fun. 🌴🌊Save $200 until January 1st with code JOYFUL200. Learn more here.
